Glitter and gall - Aerobics, a princess 'n fong kong applause
On Tuesday evening, moi found myself dazed and confused among some business people at the Turbine Hall in Newtown.
Oh, it was for the shoot of MTN's Big Break Legacy grand finale.
And moi was in the audience. Imagine!
I mean, really, one of the plebs!
The show will be aired next week, I think.
Anyways, moi went there expecting to witness the announcing of the R5m winner. Turns out they're only announcing the winner next Thursday.
Geez, the torture that suspense brings!
TV is such a funny thing - behind-the-scenes, I mean.
We were made to rehearse before the shoot.
Imagine practising the clapping of hands and standing ovations?
That whole stand-up, sit-down thang was totally humiliating when I realised it wasn't an aerobics class.
Don't ever take audience responses on TV seriously!
Think the hordes of wailing paid mourners for the late North Korean President Kim Jong-il.
Moving on. the camera finally rolled and presenter Masechaba Lakalake stepped out looking like a princess in a gold dress that looked as though it was made only for her.
It was almost unreal. The gal looked perfect! OK, so she messed up her lines from time to time but she did it with such grace.
When moi grows up I wanna be just like you, hun. Even if it's not real.
The two remaining contestants, Lebogang Khitsane and Graham Rowe, finally got their turn to strut their stuff.
Impressive indeed. Am just not sure what to choose between health care and insurance on the one hand and tombstones and marble tops on the other. But then again, who the hell wants to choose between such banal items?
Thank God I'm not obliged to.
But I am obliged to tell judge Ezra Ndwandwe to cool it a bit. That stoney-faced look is so not on.
Geez, people must learn to relax a little.
We can only deal with one Randall Abrahams.
Besides, Ezra, you look hot when you smile.
Shwashwi is so disappointed that there was no scandal that night, just for the heck of it.
Maybe there will be on the day of the announcement and just maybe I'll be there to congratulate the winner.
Among other things.